Missisippi
And now, here's the (not so) long awaited response to
Mr. Kepple's post. My responses are in bold.
The Sahara of the Bozart, AD 2002
Patrick Carver, a Southerner who unfortunately hails from Jackson, Miss., has reproduced a transcript of a Paul Harvey radio commentary lauding the achievements of The Magnolia State. Upon reading it, one finds it an interesting but hackneyed commentary, and a tired one at that. The good old boys down in Arkansas wrote an infuriated version of that in the early 20th Century, and the vitriolic commentator H.L. Mencken had a ball tearing it -- not to mention the rest of the South -- to shreds.
Now, any good Mencken collection should have his classic essay "The Sahara of the Bozart," and other commentaries on the cultural life in our Southern provinces. But since Mr Mencken is no longer with us, I shall take up the Northern sword in response to Mr Carver's post, and trample out the vintage in defense of my roots.
Assuming that Mr. Mencken was right about the South, that particular essay was written nearly over 80 years ago. Maybe, just maybe, things have changed since then.
For such defensive articles are in truth offensive screeds, designed to mask a gross inferiority complex. They do that through implicitly attacking their Northern brethren, folks who have no need for odes and tracts proclaiming their worth. When Mr Carver spreads the Harveyan gospel that Mississippi is prosperous and advanced and civilised, the mostly unsaid corollary is that the carpetbagging moneygrubbing mackerel-snappers north of the Mason-Dixon are barbarous wretches. And since Mr Carver makes it clear his least favourite states are situated here in the Northeast, I for one shall not let this slander against my honour and my region stand.
Why don’t I like the Northeast? Well, the six states of New England have bestowed the US with politicians like Ted Kennedy, Patrick Kennedy, Bernie Sanders, John Kerrey, Joseph Lieberman, Christopher Dodd, and everybody’s favorite turncoat, Jumpin’ Jim Jeffords. I will admit though, New Hampshire does appear to be a lone corridor of sanity in that liberal wasteland. It’s Congressional delegation averages a 85 rating by the American Conservative Union. But that doesn’t excuse the fact that it’s full of Yankees.
Yep. Line-by-line takedown, of course.
The pack-media could not wait to remake the movie MISSISSIPPI BURNING into a TV version called MURDER IN MISSISSIPPI. Thus yet another generation of Americans is being indoctrinated with indelible snapshots which are half a century out of date. The very idea that anybody from New York, D.C., Chicago or L.A. could launch stones from those shabby glass houses toward anybody else is patently absurd.
It's not our fault that Mississippi's remnants of Ku Kluxery decided to lynch some of our civil rights volunteers back in the Sixties. If the Magnolia State had actually let blacks vote back then, we wouldn't have had all of these problems in the first place. So, to complain about a television movie which used history as its backdrop is disingenuous and appalling. Besides, when Hollywood produced "The Winds of War" back in the Eighties, no German complained about his nation's portrayal -- so neither should a citizen of Mississippi.
Not every movie that involves Germany in some matter includes the Nazis or World War II. However, most movies (To Kill a Mockingbird, The Chamber, Mississippi Burning, A Time to Kill, etc.) about Mississippi how racist the place is.
Lilliputians have psychological need to make everybody else appear small and Mississippi, too nice to fight back, is such an easy target.
When was the last time anyone attacked Mississippi for anything? There's no need.
Aren’t you attacking Mississippi right now?
The International Ballet Competition regularly rotates among four citadels where there is a sufficiency of sophisticated art appreciation: Varna, Bulgaria; Helsinki, Finland; Moscow, Russia; and Jackson, Mississippi.
One of these things is not like the other! One of these things is not -- the -- same!
No state can point to a richer per capita contribution to arts and letters. William Faulkner, Richard Wright, Walker Percy, Ellen Douglas, Willie Morris, Margaret Walker Alexander, Eudora Welty, Tennessee Williams, Thomas Harris (Silence of the Lambs) and John Grisham are Mississippians. As are Leontyne Price, Elvis Presley, Tammy Wynette, B.B. King, Jimmy Rogers, Oprah Winfrey and Jimmy Buffett.
Actually, I'd be willing to lay two bits on the line to say there is more artistic talent in New York or Los Angeles than in Mississippi. Besides, this is all well and good, but Mencken had a quick and ready response, which I'll paraphrase. The real question, he would have said, is: how many of these people could or can bear to live there?
John Grisham seems to be able to bear it since he owns huge home just outside of Oxford, MS. William Faulkner managed to tolerate the ignorant citizens of Mississippi for 32 years in his Oxford house, “Rowan Oak.” And let’s not forget Ms. Eudora Welty who lived in Jackson for decades until she passed away recently.
And the state stays busy-manufacturing more upholstered furniture than any state...testing space shuttle engines for NASA...building rocket motors.
Gosh, more upholstered furniture than any other state. Now, I don't know what this says about the wage-scales for skilled labour down there. I would, however, point out that Ohio, Florida, and Texas are where the Real Work of the space program is done.
I think testing space shuttle engines for NASA to make sure they don’t do annoying things like blowing up or shutting down after blast-off can be considered Real Work. And let the record show that No Work for the space program is done in New Hampshire.
There's more stuff, and apparently there's also some interesting insight into Mississippi's contributions to the medical field, which are admittedly impressive, except for the fact that they all happened back in the early Sixties. What's happened recently? Surely such an enlightened State would continue in its pioneering work. Sadly, no evidence is given of The Magnolia State's continued pre-eminence in this domain. I suppose all the doctors and the lawyers and such went off to gamble away their paycheques in the many casinos that have sprung up all over Mississippi like a cancer.
In fact the state has continued in medical progress. Mississippi is home of the Methodist Rehabilitation Center, named in 2000 by U.S. World News and Report as one of America’s best hospitals and is “one of only 17 hospitals in the country designated a Traumatic Brain Injury Model System by the National Institute on Disability and Rehabilitation Research.”.
Also, “paycheques”? Just because you live near Canada, it doesn’t mean you have to spell like Canadians.
Maybe Mississippi is right to downplay it's opportunities, advantages and refinement. The ill-mannered rest of us, converging, would surely mess it up.
Now, I can see someone saying this about New Hampshire, as the state's opportunities, advantages and refinement have led to a convergence of people who want to do nothing but mess it up. But I don't think that this will happen in Missisippi. Consider, just as an example:
Year 2000 Crime Rate in MS: 4,004.4 per 100,000 persons. (violent: 360.3 per 100,000; 9 murders per 100K)
Year 2000 Crime Rate in NH: 2,433.1 per 100,000 persons (violent: 175.4 per 100,000; 2 murders per 100K)
Source: FBI Uniform Crime Report (2000)
MS, Percentage of People in Poverty, 2000: 14.5%
NH, Percentage of People in Poverty, 2000: 6.3%
MS, Median Income, 2000: $31,528
NH, Median Income, 2000: $48,928
Source: U.S. Census Bureau
Well, what do you expect of a state run by Democrats non-stop for over 130 years?
Besides, as Mr Carver wisely wrote in another post arguing in favour of keeping Mississippi's segregationist flag: "Gov. Musgrove, wouldn't factors like high tax rates and juries that give away settlements that rival Powerball drawings have more affect on job creation?"
Aye, that they would.
At least here we agree somewhat.